the non-vegan people in my life are so shocked it’s not real eggs.

I think it's lovely that your friends respect your lifestyle and love you so much that they're happy to lie to you about your wallpaper-paste scramble 😊

Right, I don't care who the fuck you are or if you're some kind of NHS consultant, if someone phones you. PHONES YOU! And tells you something like this, despite clear warnings from every bank and banking app you ever had not to believe them, and you believe it, I'm not going to feel sorry for you or blame your other banking app

True, but is it pedantic? The same people that complain they can't find a job are the ones that make huge grammar mistakes in their applications or résumés.

I wouldn't hire someone who was too lazy to proofread over someone who wasn't; would you? And then why should that rule not apply to your fellows on the internet?

Sometimes if you don't point out people's mistakes, you're actually hurting their future selves

I think everyone nowadays is a bit too accepting of other people's faults to try to seem a bit more morally superior themselves, without realising that they're actually being abusive in the long term

Anyway, I'm not actually serious here, I just wondered who would actually read this far

The ability to be spontaneous is directly related to your

Work/Life balance

It's almost as though you could stand up and fight for that, I dunno

If you don't know the difference between "your" and "you're", you're probably getting fired at some point anyway

It's not difficult and you could learn it in the space of a short walk

It'd impress your boss

You might've grown up thinking that was a proper bakery but it definitely isn't

He's lying, I saw Track Shovel in a cafe last week and it's definitely just Dougie Jones in a massive latex fat suit

That, and also the mayor of Paris is on a massive anti-SUV bender at the moment, hiking up parking charges to discourage people from driving them

The judge has probably been told to send a message.

You don't. Fuckin. Need. An SUV. You. Cunt

I had no idea people didn't do this! First notification I get from an app that isn't some form of messaging, straight to settings and turn off notifications.

People are getting notifications from news apps. Apart from actual World War Fuckin Three, what possible news story could be worth being disturbed by your phone for?!?

Not so much "Tread on me" as "Please stamp viciously and repeatedly on my testicles"

I think the outrage is due to the fact it was a cyclist. You can try driving round Paris and it'll take years off your life.

Cycling is a whole different story. Drivers respect cyclists and give them a wide berth; they won't overtake unless they can leave at least a metre. It's just the done thing

Damn right this cunt should have the book thrown at him

artisan

Supermarket

You may only pick one

Do yous not have proper bakeries?

A french bakery is called a boulangerie, because for centuries bread was prepared in a bowl, or boule. That gave the loaves a particular round shape, like an inverted bowl

Amazingly, it wasn't until the late 17th century that someone thought, "You know what, I could make this into different shapes, like maybe a stick shape!"

It does if your driving test involved simply navigating McDonald's drive thru without having a SHRIEKING MELTDOWN then becoming stationary in a parking area the size of a small village

In British English, a truck is a lorry, or artic. I think you mean a pickup, which used to be called a pickup in US English, but changed to truck because of insecure, tiny-penis people

I did exactly the same thing, and it's difficult. Particularly at an older age!

But it's not learners that make mistakes like saying "on accident", it's mostly native speakers. And then they pass on their mistakes to non native speakers

It's perfectly fine to call them out on it.

no photographer who included human subjects would be able to make a living.

Sounds great to me! But then, I'm a deranged lunatic from the Taliban

I know! He's fuckin Scottish. Genetics? He should look like a slice of boiled spam that fell down the back of my gran's couch in 1987

"On accident" can't be right because it makes me want to chop off all your fingers so you can never type again

You can say 40%. The numerically literate, non-credit-card owners will understand