Alizarin 2mo ago • 100%
Wtf is a matrix I thought we were supposed to take the red pill and get out of it
Alizarin 2mo ago • 75%
Recently quit being a man after a couple of conditioned behaviour
I'll preface this by saying I won't go homeless or hungry if I don't get any help but I will probably be in a lot of debt. My recent power bill was way more than expected, power company may have fucked me or some sort circuiting due to my stupidity. Either way my bill is uh more than my rent and is due soon. I also had to get some labs done for health reasons (some routine some pre-HRT). The cost of the labs was way more than I expected. I'm not in the states so can't really post Venmo etc. I guess you can PM me and we can figure something out. I feel like life would be a lot easier if I had maybe $150-220 more in my account which is currently almost empty. Then I could negotiate some payment program for the bills etc. Once again this isn't a scenario of complete destitution. Just some unexpected costs that have felt like a gut punch. I'm NGL I can max out a credit card and make do until payday after which I can maybe try and space out my expenses a bit and pay off the dues, so please do not feel obligated to help. I've been stupid with money and ordered a lot of takeout in July which kind of used up the little savings I had, it was a difficult month and work was insane(isn't an excuse I know)
Alizarin 3mo ago • 100%
I have no love for a military coup but I would like to know(genuinely asking) why the US would want to get rid of hasina.
Bangladesh has been one of the most friendly nations for foreign capital. Also their economy has been insanely neoliberal. They have extremely regressive taxation, 100+ special economic zones. Tax breaks, legal protections, generous fiscal incentives, concessions on imports, unrestricted exit policy(??? This is insane), one stop service for facilitation of foreign investors.
What exactly did she do that irked the US so much? Looks more like a protest that got hijacked by the military(maybe after this erupted there was intervention to make sure the new person wasn't left leaning? But that's far from the US orchestrating the coup)
Alizarin 3mo ago • 100%
Interesting. I read about that too. I guess first things first though, need to find horse piss dealer
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
Okay yeah it definitely feels that way at times
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
I just have this voice that says
:::spoiler CW; possible transphobia
#spoiler 'what if you're wrong and you've alienated Your family for the sake of nothing but self-indulgent, pointless navel gazing.' :::
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
Thank you for saying this, I hope that in time you can make it a guiding principle for yourself as well.
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
Woah thanks so much for sharing. I've felt a lot of these things at one time or another. (Except the part that I do enjoy penetrative sex but not more than other stuff, I wouldn't wanna lose pp function tbh) I'm so glad your family has come around and you feel joy being who you are
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
To WHAT? I don't even know
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
I'm sorry but if you can't give advice then give me money
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
Hmm makes sense. Thanks for listening doll
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
It sucks that it had to happen this way for you but I'm glad you were able to transition
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
I'm already wearing the skirts fully dolling up etc sometimes when I go out, I just meant for starting hrt or something that makes presenting as masc difficult etc for when I see them.
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
What do I need then? Just a desire to be feminine?
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
Feels like I'm doing it for attention
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
I mean yes they aren't allowed legally etc but most people don't care about parental overreach where I am. And most landlords will just evict a tenant if they know there's a possibility of people showing up making a ruckus etc, more trouble than worth etc.
Again not an absolute certainty because they're getting old but a possibility I need to consider........ All this for something I'm not even sure about and was not even a thought for most of my life.
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
Unfortunately they care but are losers lol. And I have reason to believe that they'll uh.... pursue their self appointed quest. It's a coin flip since I've known them to do more for less but at the same time getting old so who even knows. And beyond that there's just the regular hate crimes and stuff to be wary of.
Edit: maybe relevant but I'm not in the states/West so legal advice might not be applicable
Alizarin 4mo ago • 100%
I'd argue that they do actually care which is why they will never accept it because of their beliefs(I'll burn in hell for eternity etc). If they didn't care they'd be like eh nothing to do with me. I have moved out, could never even consider this otherwise, quite literally when I lived there I didn't have the space in my head to think about identity or introspect or care about how I looked at all lol. But safety does remain an issue because........ Idk how far people might go to try and save me lol.
Idk what to do. I might be trans, might just be someone who wants to look cute and I can't tell the difference anymore. Also permanently transitioning will come at great personal cost and might be a unique safety issue. Also I never had any dysphoric thoughts before 26-27y of age. I'm 31 now I've lived most of my life as a straight man maybe just keep going lmao. But I do have gender envy for days. Point being why now. Also it'll break my mother's heart if she so much as sees me in a skirt. Dad's too lol. Say what you will about 'that's on them, not your problem, transphobes bad' I can't help but love and care about them, they've really tried as parents. they're just heavily indoctrinated old ppl with calcified brains.